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  1. #81
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Estee View Post
    The First Wife is OCD and would do what she currently does even when we had a domestic, the difference now is we get double done in half the time to a higher standard.

    We have cut out the rework and the associated costs thereof.
    Not that we have a choice, but this is our view as well. It takes me half an hour run the mower over the lawn, the faster I go the better my cardio. I have a battery powered blower to clean up afterwards. We have a robotic vacuum cleaner. Daughter was taught from young that dirty dishes go in the dish washer. Very very little actually needs to be ironed. Etc.

    As for the OP, Id be inclined to go with better the devil you know, because actually the value of the thievery is pretty low and probably consistent with 80% of potential candidates. The issue is that now that she knows you are aware you have to take action. Anything else is tacit approval to go ahead or amp it up.

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  3. #82
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Never had an issue, like never, live in, drives me batty most days, but I could not ask for better, she is a blessing, genuine, raised my kids and wiped up stuff that I would not dare touch..

    SWAMBO and I simply do not have the time, most days start around 4am and end properly late..

    Sincerely, if she wants to help herself to some household goods or coins she is most welcome to it, cheap benefits for the value she adds in our lives right now, 16 years and going strong..

    She is well paid, maybe that helps, and we do not count leave days, when she wants to go she does..
    Last edited by Marcochezzi; 2021/10/24 at 08:04 AM.
    Regards - Marco Chezzi

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  5. #83
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Sharing your home with a low paid domestic is like voting for the current gov and expecting no corruption & good service delivery.

    If you really earn so much money that you don't have time cleaning after yourself, then get an aupair and pay 20k+ for the person to organise your life for you.
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  6. #84
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Lots of assumptions and judgements in this thread.

    We have 3 teenagers in the house, a constant stream of their friends, wifey and I hold fulltime jobs that knows no hours, dogs, beachsand infestation, a garden that grows as only a garden on the North Coast can, etc.....(with kids sport and school uniforms the laundry alone is a challenge).

    On weekends I am almost always busy with maintenance around the house.

    Other than that weekends is family time - beach, fishing, shooting, gallavanting and so on. Or myself fooling around in my little workshop.

    So we have a domestic 2 days in the week and a gardener on Saturdays.

    Works or us. Just fine.

    When am I suppose to light a fire and consume G&T's if I work all weekend as well?

    Because there is just no way we can get everything done during the week if we do not have help.
    Last edited by jaconell; 2021/10/24 at 09:20 AM.
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  8. #85
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Graham View Post
    Shoo. I guess I need to count myself lucky then. In my lifetime Ive had four maids - one in my childhood home, then three of my own in the three different provinces Ive lived since. Not one item, or even the inkling if stealing. Im quite sure if any of them needed these items theyd come and ask us if we could help them with it and we would gladly hand them over.

    And on the guys who believe its safer to just not have. Ok. Sure. You carry on like that then. I had a colleague that was like that, I just laughed at it. His Saturday mornings sounded awesome. (Rolleyes).
    I doubt this is true especially if you look at how previous forum members claimed stuff was stolen by moving it around first by the person wanting to repurpose said item. It would be better to say that you have never noticed anything stolen. I doubt that you have ever done a stock take on your house contents as that is most likely the only way to discover if something was stolen.

    I made the mistake of offering a reward for a valuable item to be returned. Very soon after that stuff would go missing and a reward was requested for its return.
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  9. #86
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    We were in a similar situation recently.

    We've a team of 3 ladies looking after our son and a gardener that we employ.

    We noticed some of our household items go missing. General homemaking stuff - tupperware, a fancy peeler, meat, toilet paper, milk (we went through 18l in 3 weeks). My wife & I only used milk for coffee, my son barely takes a glass of milk in with his tube feeds.

    We came to the conclusion that it was her because she's the only one who comes to work with a bag, she has issues with her cheating husband not helping out financially and her needing stuff to impress her mother who's visiting from the DRC.

    We let her go and paid her out for 2 months.

    Got no time for this ####.

  10. #87
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by ed rouillard View Post
    Helped our loyal maid's children years ago. The son was fairly bright so we:

    Employed him part time at office, paid the tuition, books, and gave study leave, medical aid etc. He was salaried as well. Worked as clerk and delivery driver with a company car.

    Worked for some 2 years. He was on his way.

    One day I saw him in the car in a strange place, stopped him and quizzed him. He had no explanation. Was cheating or jolling! I said I would talk to him with my partner present later. Long storey but i never did.

    Months later he wrote off the car and he was cheating again. We had our own hearing and fired him. Weeks later I had a black legal charge me for unfair practices or something. Had to get lawyer to counter. Then employ a labour consultant as the dude went to CCMA as well. We won but at a cost and also gobs of time. Taught a tough lesson.

    He stopped the studies, became a taxi driver I think. We stopped helping the other children over a period. Maid retired soon after. Sad storey though. Hardened my attitude must say.
    People want everything for free.
    When they get it for free they pee it away.

    Boggles my mind.

  11. #88
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Chris G View Post
    I doubt this is true especially if you look at how previous forum members claimed stuff was stolen by moving it around first by the person wanting to repurpose said item. It would be better to say that you have never noticed anything stolen. I doubt that you have ever done a stock take on your house contents as that is most likely the only way to discover if something was stolen.

    I made the mistake of offering a reward for a valuable item to be returned. Very soon after that stuff would go missing and a reward was requested for its return.
    Nope. I will firmly and confidently stand by each one of the ladies knowing that they have never stolen.
    As I said, if they really needed a consumable, they would ask and they can gladly take.

    I get the feeling that some of the mistrust demonstrated in some of the posts here lead to the issues. I mean, if my boss demonstrated such blatant mistrust to me in my workplace, I can guarantee you right now that all I would want to do is try and screw him over.
    Just saying.
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  13. #89
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by jaconell View Post
    Lots of assumptions and judgements in this thread.

    We have 3 teenagers in the house, a constant stream of their friends, wifey and I hold fulltime jobs that knows no hours, dogs, beachsand infestation, a garden that grows as only a garden on the North Coast can, etc.....(with kids sport and school uniforms the laundry alone is a challenge).

    On weekends I am almost always busy with maintenance around the house.

    Other than that weekends is family time - beach, fishing, shooting, gallavanting and so on. Or myself fooling around in my little workshop.

    So we have a domestic 2 days in the week and a gardener on Saturdays.

    Works or us. Just fine.

    When am I suppose to light a fire and consume G&T's if I work all weekend as well?

    Because there is just no way we can get everything done during the week if we do not have help.
    I hardly had to edit it at all
    We have 2 teenagers in the house, a constant stream of their friends, wifey and I hold fulltime jobs that knows no hours, dogs, beachsand infestation, a garden that grows as only a garden on the North Coast can, etc.....(with kids sport and school uniforms the laundry alone is a challenge).

    On weekends I am almost always busy with whatever the hell I want to do in my limited "me time"

    Other than that weekends is family time - beach, diving, shooting, gallavanting and so on. Or myself fooling around in my little workshop.

    So we have a domestic 3 days in the week and a gardener on Fridays.

    Works for us. Just fine.

    When am I suppose to light a fire and consume countless bottles of red if I work all weekend as well?

    Because there is just no way we can get everything done during the week if we do not have help.

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  15. #90
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Graham View Post
    Nope. I will firmly and confidently stand by each one of the ladies knowing that they have never stolen.
    As I said, if they really needed a consumable, they would ask and they can gladly take.

    I get the feeling that some of the mistrust demonstrated in some of the posts here lead to the issues. I mean, if my boss demonstrated such blatant mistrust to me in my workplace, I can guarantee you right now that all I would want to do is try and screw him over.
    Just saying.
    If that is the bar, then the mistrust may be blatant but not misplaced.
    Last edited by Woestyn Willem; 2021/10/26 at 07:31 AM.
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  17. #91
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Graham View Post
    I mean, if my boss demonstrated such blatant mistrust to me in my workplace, I can guarantee you right now that all I would want to do is try and screw him over.
    Just saying.
    So what you're saying is that the ANC is doing to this country exactly what you would do in that position. Noice.

  18. #92
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Graham View Post
    I mean, if my boss demonstrated such blatant mistrust to me in my workplace, I can guarantee you right now that all I would want to do is try and screw him over.
    Just saying.
    Thats an unfortunate attitude Graham, one I wouldnt have attributed to you.

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  19. #93
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by duncang View Post
    Apololgies to Finn but my take is those with full time maids have messy kids..
    My take:
    Kids make their own beds every day , if you have a domestic or not.

    You can thank me later. EFT is also fine.

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  21. #94
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Estee View Post
    Thats an unfortunate attitude Graham, one I wouldnt have attributed to you.

    Yep, changed my opinion as well
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  22. #95
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Estee View Post
    Its an interesting point but personally, no. I would prefer to receive a service to the level of expectation and I am willing to pay for it, with a reasonable expectation of not having to repair, replace items or have things pilfered or purloined.

    However, I advocate washing a vehicle as being First Line Maintenance and when you wash your vehicle yourself, its amazing what you pick up, from stone chips to leaks etc.

    This is now my view, its first line maintenance and I now have a full list of chores, mainly preventative maintenance tasks which I can do before it costs me more in additional repair costs.

    And the jobs are done in half the time and to a higher standard than previously achieved or attained

    Quote Originally Posted by Estee View Post
    The First Wife is OCD and would do what she currently does even when we had a domestic, the difference now is we get double done in half the time to a higher standard.

    We have cut out the rework and the associated costs thereof.
    Couldn't agree more!

    I like the hands on approach.

    We do everything ourselves and we know what's going on with our stuff!

    But its not for everyone, it depends on your circumstances.

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  24. #96
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    So interesting how everyone has to "defend" their choices so harshly. But I guess that is the nature of this forum - if you drive a Toyota / a Pajero / a VW....

    If you don't want a helper, don't have one.

    If you do, have one help you out.

    Some domestic workers steal, some do not. Your anecdotal experience is nothing more than that.

    Personally, living in South Africa, I think employing people to assist at home is one way to try assist (in a very small way) correcting our unbalanced past (and a major benefit to offset the other negatives of the country). But agree there is no need to employ a person who steals. This is not only a domestic worker level issue only. I have had R15k+ salaried employee's who thought the company supplied them toilet roll for home plus milk for breakfast everyday etc!

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  26. #97
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by kevin4x4 View Post
    So interesting how everyone has to "defend" their choices so harshly. But I guess that is the nature of this forum - if you drive a Toyota / a Pajero / a VW....

    If you don't want a helper, don't have one.

    If you do, have one help you out.

    Some domestic workers steal, some do not. Your anecdotal experience is nothing more than that.

    Personally, living in South Africa, I think employing people to assist at home is one way to try assist (in a very small way) correcting our unbalanced past (and a major benefit to offset the other negatives of the country). But agree there is no need to employ a person who steals. This is not only a domestic worker level issue only. I have had R15k+ salaried employee's who thought the company supplied them toilet roll for home plus milk for breakfast everyday etc!
    How does it assist? Were there not domestic workers pre-1994?
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  27. #98
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by kevin4x4 View Post
    Personally, living in South Africa, I think employing people to assist at home is one way to try assist (in a very small way) correcting our unbalanced past (and a major benefit to offset the other negatives of the country). But agree there is no need to employ a person who steals. This is not only a domestic worker level issue only. I have had R15k+ salaried employee's who thought the company supplied them toilet roll for home plus milk for breakfast everyday etc!
    Altruism is a poor reason for employing.

    The toilet roll and milk you mention, thats pilferage which is the ''action of stealing things of little value''
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  29. #99
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by MANDREAS View Post
    How does it assist? Were there not domestic workers pre-1994?
    Sure there was. Not earning at the same level as now (even inflation adjusted), plus the alternative for most of this level person is sitting at home living on a government grant...

    Since you are suggesting it does not assist then what is your alternate suggestion?

  30. #100
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    Default Re: MAD MAD MAD - Caught our domestic stealing - again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Estee View Post
    Altruism is a poor reason for employing.

    The toilet roll and milk you mention, thats pilferage which is the ''action of stealing things of little value''
    I agree. Probably the worst reason to employ (coupled with the misplaced notion of "empowerment") - that is from a capitalistic point of view.
    Cheers
    Willem Greyling

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