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  1. #41
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by Estee View Post

    One never knows who the person you help is but one also never knows who the person you help could turn out to be.
    I read in this a reply in statement to my post and I thank you in this regard..

    This is true, and wise, and quite typically overtly simple when looking back on circumstance, unfortunately emotions play a large part when it comes to family, and the hunter knows how to use this to his advantage..

    Reading Odinn, where does one draw the line to a contract being entered into, its no different to business agreements, no different at all..

    The terms of the help were clearly defined by the hunter, absolutely no objections whatsoever to a simple agreement between him and I on his promise to repay the 'loan' at zero interest within one calendar year - pretty good terms in my opinion - with the hunters clear silent intention of reneging on the deal from onset being his obvious motive, as clearly seen played, 4 years down the line.

    Undisclosed in my previous post: I did not set the terms, ever, it was ultimately brought to me as a 'business' proposal, his request, and his promise of return including interest payment which I refused (interest), however insisted the capital be repaid, as per his proposal..

    Situation is I was played, I became his prey, and at the end I decided I no longer liked this, 4 years from start to finish..

    Convert the above to a simple business transaction between client and supplier, between partner and partner, between investor and investee. Where would you stand..?? Suddenly it becomes not so easy, especially where one does not have the wall of 'corporate' legal protection to hide behind, or use for aid..

    I regained my capital, but lost a significant 'investment' portion had I never handed over the capital in the first place, I'll classify that loss my Odinn moment, and live with the scenario that plays out..

    I might live with regret, and then I might be thankful, only time can tell..
    Last edited by Marcochezzi; 2021/04/14 at 07:39 AM.
    Regards - Marco Chezzi

    There are two kinds of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data..

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  3. #42
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by Estee View Post
    I am always in two minds about this type of scenario and how to approach it and I often remind myself of the following:

    A Woodcutter was busy in a forest, felling trees and preparing the wood when he was approached by a stranger. The stranger was none other than Odinn himself. Odinn said to the Woodcutter, ''I have been travelling far and I am tired and weary. I will rest up here for awhile, why dont you return home and prepare a meal for me''.

    The Woodcutter rushed home and he and his wife prepared a sumptuous meal for Odinn, using the best of everything they had. After a short while, there was a knock at the door and expecting Odinn, the Woodcutter dashed to open it, but found a decrepit old hag, in tattered clothes. She asked for hospitality and the Woodcutter asked her in and sat her at the table and told her to feast and rest. After her fill, she bade the Woodcutter and his family farewell and she left.

    After a short period, there was a knock again and again, the Woodcutter dashed to the door and opened it to find a Bard standing there in disheveled clothes. The Bard requested hospitality and was directed to sit at the table and eat and rest. After a short while, the Bard too rose and thanked the Woodcutter for the hospitality and left.

    Shortly thereafter, another knock at the door had the Woodcutter again rushing to open the door only to find a poor Merchant who had been robbed and who also asked for hospitality. The Merchant was directed to a now depleted table but there was sufficient to restore him and offer rest. Once replete, the Merchant thanked the Woodcutter and his wife for their hospitality and left.

    After the passage of sometime, there were no further knocks at the door and due to the lateness of the hour, the Woodcutter and his wife went to bed. The Woodcutter was awoken to a loud banging at his door and he sleepily went and opened it, to find Odinn standing there. He asked Odinn the enter the house and apologised for not waiting up for him and also that he didnt have a sumptuous meal awaiting him. He woke his wife and asked her to prepare a simple meal with the last of the food they had left and offer it to Odinn.

    Odinn said to the Woodcutter that it wasnt necessary as he had already eaten heartily, so heartily that it could have fed an old hag, a Bard and a Merchant.

    One never knows who the person you help is but one also never knows who the person you help could turn out to be.
    Good advice Sean.
    Cheers
    Willem Greyling

    "When the wise man points at the moon, the imbecile examines the finger" - Confucius

  4. #43
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    I believe that when you help someone, it should be with firstly a hope that your help will be beneficial in the long term.
    But it remains a hope only, a sort of wish that your help can contribute to a change for the better... But it remains just a wish...
    I also believe you should not ever regret helping. No matter what.

    Because maybe that little bit of help that was given made someone who was close to the one helped, realize that a better life could be.. You never know what a little help's ripples could affect.

    But most of all I have learned that you must never feel that the person you helped owes you any gratitude.
    By expecting any form of gratitude, your "help" turns into a sort of acquisition.

    When you help, give it freely. And without regret.
    And I live by this
    Last edited by Hedgehog; 2021/04/14 at 05:23 AM.
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  6. #44
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Problem is, people become ungrateful and get greedy.
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  8. #45
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by Hedgehog View Post
    I believe that when you help someone, it should be with firstly a hope that your help will be beneficial in the long term.
    But it remains a hope only, a sort of wish that your help can contribute to a change for the better... But it remains just a wish...
    I also believe you should not ever regret helping. No matter what.

    Because maybe that little bit of help that was given made someone who was close to the one helped, realize that a better life could be.. You never know what a little help's ripples could affect.

    But most of all I have learned that you must never feel that the person you helped owes you any gratitude.
    By expecting any form of gratitude, your "help" turns into the sort of acquisition.

    When you help, give it freely. And without regret.
    And I live by this
    Well said and wise words.
    Cheers
    Willem Greyling

    "When the wise man points at the moon, the imbecile examines the finger" - Confucius

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  10. #46
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Very sad is the 'condition of Man's heart'.

    Many years ago i attended a course called the 'Divine Plumb Line' which has helped me to understand, not defend' many actions of people at large.


    A brief, very brief, summary attached for those who are 'deep' like Willem, and search for answers to the mysteries of life.
    Life is like a wall, you build a strong wall if it's 'Plumb Line is True' if you don't use a plumb line you will have a skew wall which is bound to fail and fall over.

    Roy
    Attached Images Attached Images


    Beneath every ‘Majestic Oak’ lies a ‘Tuff Nut’ that refused to give up!!

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  12. #47
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    This is another graphic illustration of the personal life outcomes of a 'skew wall'
    There are recognizable steps down towards the eventual collapse of the wall.
    Can help to identify when someone is in extreme depression and what are posssibly some of the inner conflicts that got them there.

    Click image for larger version. 

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    Roy


    Beneath every ‘Majestic Oak’ lies a ‘Tuff Nut’ that refused to give up!!

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  14. #48
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by Rainier Vermaak View Post
    A used Pajero or new Amarok would have prevented everything bad.
    Rainier
    This was only funny the first 100 times.
    Now its even funnier
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  15. #49
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by Chopped View Post
    Unfortunately, sometimes the hardening happens whether you want it or not.
    That's what she said.


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  17. #50
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Misplaced trust can end up very badly in the work place, but is usually dealt with on a professional corporate level.

    Misplaced trust that goes belly-up in a personal relationship is way worse!
    "Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity" - Martin Luther king Jr

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  19. #51
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by royjacobs View Post
    This is another graphic illustration of the personal life outcomes of a 'skew wall'
    There are recognizable steps down towards the eventual collapse of the wall.
    Can help to identify when someone is in extreme depression and what are posssibly some of the inner conflicts that got them there.

    Click image for larger version. 

Name:	Image69.jpg 
Views:	145 
Size:	17.9 KB 
ID:	612097

    Roy
    Thanks for this, Roy.

    I thought I was depressed, but I this has reminded me that I am still fine and erring on the homicidal side as always...
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  21. #52
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by MANDREAS View Post
    Ek is 'n diep bliksem - unbeknownst to most.

    Long story short - a person stole and lied, then tried to get others to lie for her.

    I am sad because of her children, knowing what they went through in their life, and their mom's actions will probably give them no chance in their life going forward.

    I am truly saddened by this.
    The sins of the fathers are visited upon the children.


    Last edited by Steady; 2021/04/13 at 03:08 PM.

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  23. #53
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Willem, as said before, find peace in the fact that you tried to help. You showed your humanity. You opened your door.

    The fact that it was slammed in your face, or even worse, broken off the hinges, should not discourage you from rebuilding the door, and opening it up again.

    The law of circulation is very real. If you give abundantly for the right reason (i.e. not expecting anything in return), you will be met with abundance. The polar opposite is also true.
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  25. #54
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    You sure have a way with words

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  27. #55
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by FWM View Post
    Rainier
    This was only funny the first 100 times.
    Now its even funnier
    The answer used to be 42.


    A WK, XJ and a Ducati...

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    Daar’s nog maar een soos hy; bekyk hom goed."

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  29. #56
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by MANDREAS View Post
    Ek vind sulke gedrag selfsugtig. Fine as sy 'n washout wil wees, maar dink aan die kinders. Hemel weet!
    It's a learnt reaction, handed down from parent to child.
    Barring good fortune/luck/divine intervention, we all repeat the lessons we saw in our foundation years because they are our "normal".
    Cheers,
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  31. #57
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by Nys View Post
    If you give abundantly for the right reason (i.e. not expecting anything in return), you will be met with abundance.
    At risk of appearing overly cynical...

    He gave, expecting only that the person would grow....and the only abundance he met with was negative.
    Cheers,
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  32. #58
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by JohnnoK View Post
    It's a learnt reaction, handed down from parent to child.
    Barring good fortune/luck/divine intervention, we all repeat the lessons we saw in our foundation years because they are our "normal".
    Culture and traditions are also learned behaviours but there is always nature's curve ball........................ genetics.
    Estee = S T = Sean Towlson

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  34. #59
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Quote Originally Posted by Estee View Post
    I am always in two minds about this type of scenario and how to approach it and I often remind myself of the following:

    A Woodcutter was busy in a forest, felling trees and preparing the wood when he was approached by a stranger. The stranger was none other than Odinn himself. Odinn said to the Woodcutter, ''I have been travelling far and I am tired and weary. I will rest up here for awhile, why dont you return home and prepare a meal for me''.

    The Woodcutter rushed home and he and his wife prepared a sumptuous meal for Odinn, using the best of everything they had. After a short while, there was a knock at the door and expecting Odinn, the Woodcutter dashed to open it, but found a decrepit old hag, in tattered clothes. She asked for hospitality and the Woodcutter asked her in and sat her at the table and told her to feast and rest. After her fill, she bade the Woodcutter and his family farewell and she left.

    After a short period, there was a knock again and again, the Woodcutter dashed to the door and opened it to find a Bard standing there in disheveled clothes. The Bard requested hospitality and was directed to sit at the table and eat and rest. After a short while, the Bard too rose and thanked the Woodcutter for the hospitality and left.

    Shortly thereafter, another knock at the door had the Woodcutter again rushing to open the door only to find a poor Merchant who had been robbed and who also asked for hospitality. The Merchant was directed to a now depleted table but there was sufficient to restore him and offer rest. Once replete, the Merchant thanked the Woodcutter and his wife for their hospitality and left.

    After the passage of sometime, there were no further knocks at the door and due to the lateness of the hour, the Woodcutter and his wife went to bed. The Woodcutter was awoken to a loud banging at his door and he sleepily went and opened it, to find Odinn standing there. He asked Odinn the enter the house and apologised for not waiting up for him and also that he didnt have a sumptuous meal awaiting him. He woke his wife and asked her to prepare a simple meal with the last of the food they had left and offer it to Odinn.

    Odinn said to the Woodcutter that it wasnt necessary as he had already eaten heartily, so heartily that it could have fed an old hag, a Bard and a Merchant.

    One never knows who the person you help is but one also never knows who the person you help could turn out to be.

    This story makes me think the woodcutter needs a big electric fence, and a vicious dog outside his house
    Last edited by WAJ; 2021/04/14 at 07:43 AM.
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  36. #60
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    Default Re: A tale of misplaced trust

    Maybe I'm too harsh in my thinking....... When I'm lied to or when I have helped someone and then that person lied to me or scr...d me over, I will never ever help that person again.

    In my company there's a golden rule: you can mess up, make mistakes etc. all ok, we'll sort it out together. You lie to me, and just once is enough, you won't have a happy live in the company.

    There's nothing that I hate more than lying people, and especially those that you have helped. Just my 2 cents.
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