How to fight fairly - Page 2





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  1. #21
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    I dont get it........ does this mean I have to call Appliance owning GNU "Toyota owners" in future?

    Now THAT would be insensitive an insulting 😉😈
    Last edited by ThysleRoux; 2017/06/22 at 08:40 PM.

  2. #22
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    Default How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by Mad Manny View Post
    You have got to hand it to Johan, despite getting a pounding from the guys he still takes it on the chin.

    The Forum would be a better place if otherswere as easy going as him.
    Quote Originally Posted by Apocalypse View Post
    Johan is a top chap as they say.

    but that's not his chin!

    Which of the seven are you referring to?

    Last edited by Johan Slabbert; 2017/06/22 at 08:40 PM.

  3. #23
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    eish. This is going to be difficult
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  4. #24
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by jelo View Post
    you see what I mean?

    To the grave, I tell you, to the grave...........
    "I understand what you are saying."

  5. #25
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by JohanSlabbert View Post
    Which of the seven are you referring to?


    Im telling you .

    spitting image ! 😂

  6. #26
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by Mad Manny View Post
    You repeat yourself.
    That's conversational redundancy....
    Tempted, not taking the bait.
    "Everything has its limit - iron ore cannot be educated into gold."




  7. #27
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by Apocalypse View Post
    Im telling you .

    spitting image ! 😂
    You keep changing your story

    http://www.4x4community.co.za/forum/...18#post3052218

  8. #28
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    So.... what is the thread about then?
    High: KIA Sorento 2.5 Crdi 4x4
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  9. #29
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by WAJ View Post
    So.... what is the thread about then?
    1) Don't bring a knife to a gunfight.
    2) Do unto others before they do unto you.

  10. #30
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Dirk posted new guidelines.

    We are testing them on Spongebath Nopants.

    Seems they're workable...

  11. #31
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by Chris Stoffel View Post
    1) Don't bring a knife to a gunfight.

    You missed: "Remember who has the knife, and who has the gun"

  12. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Dirk For This Useful Post:


  13. #32
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Somehow I thinks the intentions of this thread were slightly derailed.

    Personally I enjoy the good natured jibes esp manny. Bit sometimes people do get personal.

  14. #33
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by Dirk View Post
    Written for other platforms, but there are some (handful) of people here who is currently doing their best to make the experience here as sour as possible for others.

    Please go read this.

    https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...r-social-media

    Approach every thread (including your own) with kindness and respect, rather than slamming it.
    This shows that you are being thoughtful rather than reactionary, which is likely to invite thoughtfulness rather than flames. For example, avoid expressions like this: “Your views are hypocritical/ misguided/ close-minded/ wrong.” Instead, try responses like this: “Your view is popular, but have you considered these facts/ new research/ social or legal progress/ the latest medical knowledge?”


    Reduce your stress by suspending judgment.
    It’s easy to label other perspectives as uninformed or irrational. It’s tempting to judge others as foolish, short-sighted, or stupid. Moral indignation and self-righteousness can make us feel high and mighty. But the flip side is that it’s distressing to think, “I’m surrounded by idiots!” or “The world is going to hell in a hand basket!” When judgments bubble up in your mind, take note, and then don’t act on them. Instead acknowledge that each person is thinking and expressing exactly as they are meant to. Suspending judgment eliminates the stress of requiring others to see it your way.


    Be a butterfly, not a bull in a china shop.
    When you comment, if you charge in and try to force change, people are likely to feel threatened and become defensive and close-minded. They may even shut out you and your message. Instead, flit about and gently plant seeds that might lead to change. For example, post compassionate, hopeful, or insightful messages such as this or this.


    State your intentions clearly, with warmth.
    For example, this: “I’m interested in spreading understanding/empathy/peace.” Or, “If you’d like to know more about this, here’s a link.” NOT “Here’s a better/ the right/ the only sensible way to think about this.”


    Do your research.
    If you’re interested enough to comment or post on an issue, become informed so you can say what you mean and mean what you say.


    Be a critical thinker.
    Seek out reputable, credible sources that are interested in reporting the facts and providing a thoughtful analysis of the complexities and gray areas. Nothing worth arguing about is ever simple or absolute. Question gossipy, catastrophizing, conspiracy theorizing, or one-note people or organizations that promote a narrow agenda or sensationalize an issue. Don’t rely solely on websites like Wikipedia, as anyone can edit entries, which means no guarantee for accuracy or unbiased information.


    Invite increased awareness and clarity.
    After you've done your research and thought it through, post comments and links that are thought-provoking, well-sourced, fact-based, clarifying, and reflect the complexities of an issue. NOT ones that are thought-controlling (THIS IS THE ABSOLUTE TRUTH, PEOPLE!) or reflect a one-sided sense of superiority or condemnation.


    Respect diversity and welcome dissent.
    If someone challenges your post or comment, keep your emotional reactions to yourself (see #1). Take your time, read carefully and thoroughly, and respond when you are calm so that you don’t take the bait to get riled up. Stick to the facts and do more research in order to respond thoughtfully and completely. Remain focused on your goal to illuminate an issue, underscore compassion, promote social progress-- and learn even more yourself (see previous point).


    Invite understanding, by granting it first.
    Acknowledge opposing viewpoints with an open mind and words such as, “I understand what you’re saying.” When others feel heard, they are more likely to listen and then your words will have more impact. Start with, “I can see why you might be worried about that. Let me clarify…” or “Excellent point, and here’s another angle to consider.” NOT: “I have no idea what you’re talking about," or “This makes no sense!”


    Refrain from insulting any person or discounting, undermining, or blocking communication.
    It is counterproductive to announce, “You’re an idiot,” or “This discussion is over.” Instead, simply disagree with opinions, ideas, viewpoints, or stated “facts” by providing sound, reputable evidence for yours, such as, “Actually, according to scientific research, global warming is a proven fact, not an ‘opinion’ or ‘belief.’ Here are some links you might find interesting.”


    Don’t demand that others “respect my opinion.”
    The only way to garner respect for your opinions is to have respectable opinions. In other words, make sure that your opinions are based on straightforward, substantiated facts—not spin, fabrications, or ideology, which tend to be immune to the facts. (Adhering to an ideology is often accompanied by an attitude of “I refuse to change” or “This is for sure the way it is!”) Other ways to gain respect are to be respectful of others’ opinions, curious about differing points of view, and courteous when others comment.


    Be humble about what you know.
    Hedging with “It might be that….” is more likely to inspire open-mindedness in your audience. For some strategies to increase your persuasiveness, read this Washington Post article.


    Know when to give up.
    The more you try to convince someone that you’re right, the more they will likely dig in and stick to their viewpoint. According to a Cornell study, after 4 back-and-forth exchanges, if the other person hasn’t come around by then, they probably won’t.


    Understand the limits of logical arguments.
    When people get emotional, insulting, or irrational, disengage with them. Although it can be tempting to reply, just let it lie. Replying will only fan the flames.


    Have integrity.
    Think it through before posting. Be willing to acknowledge other points of view and edit your thoughts according to new insights or information offered to you.


    Be compassionate.
    When someone is pushing back and promoting the status quo, it is likely that they are either uninformed on the issue, misunderstanding the point, or afraid of what change might look like—or all of the above. Particularly if you believe someone is reflecting ignorance, simple-mindedness, or bigotry, hold onto compassion, and remain humble (see above).


    Have realistic expectations.
    If you are going to post controversial material, you are inviting controversy. Be prepared for the rumble, so that you don’t feel shocked or dismayed by it.


    If you adhere to these guidelines, everyone may not end up agreeing with you, but they will still follow you and/or want to be your friend.
    Dirk while I agree with everything, I have to say that people should maybe be a bit less sensitive about what other say about them. The Forum is not a place to look for validation. Or a pat on the back.

    Sometimes I wish people will realise that offense can only be taken...

  15. #34
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by stephenplumb View Post
    Somehow I thinks the intentions of this thread were slightly derailed.

    Personally I enjoy the good natured jibes esp manny. Bit sometimes people do get personal.
    Not at all.

    Just old hands showing how we can all have fun and still be friends


    PS. I'll get Manny back soon

  16. #35
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by JohanSlabbert View Post
    Those pictures were before you bought the pizza shop!!

  17. #36
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by Apocalypse View Post
    Those pictures were before you bought the pizza shop!!
    As if you still look like this:

    http://www.4x4community.co.za/forum/...04#post3053604

  18. #37
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by JohanSlabbert View Post
    Why!!!!!??


    I have just paid the last therapy bill!!!!!
    Last edited by pierre2013; 2017/06/22 at 09:19 PM.

  19. #38
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by pierre2013 View Post
    Why!!!!!??


    I have just paid the last therapy bill!!!!!
    Sorry

    Note to Apoc: Just say I'm right. We don't want proof either way

  20. #39
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by pierre2013 View Post
    Why!!!!!??


    I have just paid the last therapy bill!!!!!
    Ag siestog, go for a test drive in the new V6 Amarok and all your troubles will be washed away.

  21. #40
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    Default Re: How to fight fairly

    Quote Originally Posted by Chris Stoffel View Post
    Ag siestog, go for a test drive in the new V6 Amarok and all your troubles will be washed away.
    No. Just no.

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